ADHD Source Revealed

August 7th, 2009

I think I may have discovered the source of the ADHD epidemic that appears to be running rampant through this generation of children. It is sitting in my living room.

Yes, my friends, it is true. The reason our children are bouncing off the walls like ping pong balls is…the LeapFrog Learn and Groove Musical Table.

This astonishing contraption (which we’re borrowing from another mommy friend) could probably also be named the LeapFrog 100 Way to Make Noise Table. There are about a dozen different buttons to push or gears to move and all them result in a noise — sometimes it’s music, sometimes the alphabet, sometimes numbers, sometimes colors, sometimes shapes.

You get the picture.

What makes this particularly mind befuddling is that the sounds interrupt each other. So, if you push the green circle (“green…circle…” says the voice) but then slide the number gadget, a jaunty voice interrupts our color/shape lesson to sing out the numbers 1-10. And if you were listening to the alphabet song but happen to push one of the keyboard keys, something new comes on.

And given that what Miss Mouse most enjoys is banging gleefully on the buttons, the resulting cacophony of sound is enough to make you wish you didn’t have ears.

Oh, and to add to the fun, there’s a little switch you can throw that changes the language from English to Spanish, thereby doubling the number of sound permutations available. Oy vey.

I really believe that, were this Miss Mouse’s only educational resource, she would never learn the alphabet. I have yet to hear that sing-song voice get past the letter “G” before being interrupted by something else.

And yet. And yet. Miss Mouse loves it. She stands with a look of rapt attention on her face as she pushes the buttons and watches them light up. Mommy and daddy will just invest in some industrial grade ear plugs and everyone will be happy.

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